Positive
Self Talk:
How to Get It and Make It Automatic
Positive
self
talk can quickly be obtained by
managing your negative
“brain trains” in a very simple and straightforward
way that becomes addictive.
You can use the power
of suggestion simply by changing the phrases
you use in your inner talk.
Your self talk is also a
form of autosuggestion
or self
suggestion, which is exactly what it says it is...
Your
"automatic" thoughts or "self" suggestions programming you minute by
minute.
And, yes some people spell it auto-suggestion,
but either way, you're automatically continuing the same line of
thoughts until you decide to make a change.
What is positive
self talk?
First,
let's discuss what it is and why you want it.
Positive
self talk is a way your internal voice talks to you that
uplifts you and encourages you.
One benefit that the field of positive
psychology
has discovered is that positive people have more
“brain” available to them for use. So the
more positive you become, the more aptitude you have for achieving
results...
In other words, having more brain to use equals...
Having
a better ability
to think, which equals...
Making your life work
smarter!
Okay, so let's move on to...
Distinguishing
Between Positive and Negative Talk
How to
Start
More Positive Self Talk
How to
Make Positive
Thoughts Automatic
Distinguishing
Between Positive Self Talk
and Negative Self Talk
Are you using your
"automatic" power
of suggestion positively or negatively?
Like
I said earlier,
positive self talk is that internal voice that “uplifts and
encourages” us...
Sometimes,
though, our inner talk isn't guiding us as positively as we think.
Take these two examples:
“I
won't fail – I've got to do this – I'm scared, but
I'm doing it anyway.”
vs.
“I
choose to do this – I am moving toward success – I
have the power to make this work.”
Now take a moment and re-read example #1 taking a
few seconds to
“feel” those words. Let
the
energy of those words resonate with you
for about 10
seconds...
“I
won't fail – I've got to do this – I'm scared, but
I'm doing it anyway.”
How
do they make you feel?
Maybe a little “motivated?”
Now re-read the second example and do the same...
“I
choose to do this – I am moving toward success – I
have the power to make this work.”
How
did you feel with the second example?
Relieved?
When I just did this,
I took a sigh of relief with the second phrase. It made me feel good.
So, which example “uplifted and
encouraged” you?
Made you feel "relieved?"
Did
you feel that example #1 was something like a drill sergeant? Trying to
motivate you to do something “against all odds?”
Sometimes motivating ourselves that way works, but
wouldn't it be nicer to move to the next level and have positive self
talk that comes from a place of power?
That second example comes from that place of power.
Look at it again...
I choose...
There's no victim here.
I
am moving...
Taking action.
I
have the power...
Encouraging
you to be powerful.
Now I know these two examples are rather extreme, but I wanted to make
the point that sometimes our innertalk isn't helping us as best as it
can and that there are other choices to make in the same situation...
The
same rules I just used for writing
the above affirmations
should be applied to managing your self talk...
Look for the
positive twist of the phrase or situation.
When you find yourself focused on pushing yourself through something, take
a break and find a gentler,
better feeling way to accomplish
the same goal.
And, by the
way, anything that we're "thinking in our heads" eventually comes out
our mouths. So if you want to keep positive
speech in your life, start
with what you're saying to yourself in your head.
Okay,
next...
How
to
Start More Positive Self Talk
First step
is to become consciously
aware of the “brain
trains” that are
chugging through your head day and night...
Those
trains of thought that run rampant like a runaway locomotive...
You've
got to get in the middle of the “inner talk” tracks
and say “Stop.”
So, first step
is to bring
your
awareness to what you're thinking about.
Sounds
simple enough, right?
Okay, but how do you do that when you're taking the
kids to soccer and have a million things to do?
Just start...
Start to notice
what goes on in your head.
Are you worrying?
Worry is negative visualization,
you know. You're broadcasting "thoughts" to the universe about
something that you don't want to happen...
So...
Stop
it in its tracks!
Just say “stop” either out loud or internally.
If you're walking down
a busy
city street, I think you'll agree it's a risky choice to suddenly say
"Stop" out loud!
I don't know about you, but I don't
think that the people out there who are walking the streets and talking
out loud to themselves are practicing positive thinking...
Or
even coherent thinking.
Better to be in your car -
alone - or just keep it to yourself.
Do
anything to stop that
train.
Put in a movie, go for a walk,
get further into work...
Whatever it takes to keep
that train halted.
On the definition
of
positive attitude
page, there's a very cute Bob Newhart video that humorously makes this
point. If you have the time, take a minute to go there now,
watch
the video and then hit the back button...
I'll wait
here for your return.
Okay,
once the "brain" train is stopped, then it's time to coach
yourself
to finding the opposite of each “negative thought”
train.
Find the positive side of things...
What are you learning from the experience?
How can you make the experience different?
Gee, does that second one ask you to be powerful
and take action?
Yes, be powerful and take
action
once you've stopped the negative self talk train.
If
you want a program that gives you greater detail in how to identify your self
talk
as well as gives you tools such as a 10-step guided meditation script,
meditation audios, silent subliminals that help you trust yourself and
other "goodies" that help you take charge of your life, check out The Effective Positive Thinking Program.
Before
you know it, the positive self talk train starts rolling down the
tracks and the more it rolls, the more speed and momentum it creates,
which is what I'll discuss next...
How
to
Make Positive Thoughts Automatic
Now
that you've...
Become
aware of your
“brain trains”
Taken
charge
of
your inner talk
by stopping the train
Re-routed
the negative
thinking to more
positive thoughts,
Your self image begins to
change, both externally and
internally.
Externally,
you're happier more often...
You start
dressing differently...
Or becoming more active.
People are more drawn to you now...
Instead of complaining, you take action.
Instead of letting your drill sergeant
“rag on
you,” you're gentler with yourself inside, so you've
become gentler and more peaceful outside...
Internal change brings external change –
we've all heard
that.
In the movie,“What
the Bleep Do We
Know,” they discuss how our cell receptors change to
accommodate the “most prevalent” emotion.
That
we actually get physically “addicted” to whatever
thoughts we are constantly thinking.
So, if you're always angry, you put out
“angry
chemicals” and your cell receptors change over to accommodate
the new chemicals in your system.
But what if you've interrupted that
process by externally
switching to positive self talk.
You've
changed the data feed
to your system.
So, if you were originally
addicted to anger, by
removing that chemical and replacing it with “calm”
chemistry, your body will actually help you by replacing the
angry
receptors with “calm” receptors...
Which
cycles back
into more “calm” chemistry in your system, thus
more receptors, etc., etc.
It's really all very scientific. Be sure to check
out, “What
the Bleep” to get the whole story – it's really
fascinating...
And the way they present it is very
funny too. Yes, the movie's very
dry and scientific, but the part that drives home what I'm talking
about here is hysterical.
Summary
Positive self
talk is your innertalk
that encourages and uplifts you.
Changing
your addiction
from
negative thinking to positive thoughts is “do-able”
by:
Becoming
aware of your thoughts,
and
Stopping
them and
consciously “flipping” them to becoming positive.
Positive thoughts
are what make positive self talk.
Being kind to
yourself is the secret to making this work...
After
all, if you're kind to yourself, wouldn't it make sense that your
“chemical” factory would be putting out
“kindness” chemicals, to which your cells could
become addicted?
Positive self talk is the key.
Take the first step...
Be sure to check out
this article
too if you haven't already: