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Define Emotional Intelligence
In Relation to Happiness


To define emotional intelligence is a daunting task when you are looking through all of the scientific jargon associated with the emotional intelligence theory.  However, it is simply a new term for a very old way of living.

History of EQ

While many of the articles on emotional intelligence (also called "EQ") today refer to the book “Emotional Intelligence” by Daniel Goleman, if you do a thorough emotional intelligence review, you'll find that the earliest roots of emotional intelligence research can be traced back to Darwin's theories on survival and adaptation, as well as having various people through the 1900's write articles on emotional intelligence.

In fact, the term “emotional intelligence” appears to have come from a man named Wayne Payne in 1985. 

So, what does this all mean?  It means that many people have embarked on creating a definition of emotional intelligence.

Today, however, articles on emotional intelligence in business are wide spread and very popular because of how well the business world has been able to integrate emotional intelligence training into their business models and having success.

Definition of Emotional Intelligence

According to Wikipedia, the definition of emotional intelligence is as follows:

While Wikipedia's answer to the question, “What is Emotional Intelligence” is accurate, let's put some practical application to it.

DEFINE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE - IDENTIFY:  First, in any emotional intelligence assessment you'll want to become self aware of your own emotions and how they feel.  While this may sound easy enough, in today's busy society, we don't always have the time, energy and “thought power” to apply this component of the emotional intelligence theory.

One way to identify your emotions is simply to stop whatever your thinking about and simply ask your “gut” how it feels.  While I'm sure this sounds like I'm making the complicated subject of emotional intelligence theory overly simplified, this is where happiness starts... by listening to your “gut.”

DEFINE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE - ASSESS:  Next, you'll want to assess the emotions that you have identified. To do this effectively, you'll want to “get out of your head” and into how your body feels when thinking about each particular emotion.

For example, right now, let's say you have something on your mind that just “feels icky.”  In fact, every time you think about it, there is some kind of “twisting,” “churning” or “stuck” feeling inside your body.  This is your emotional intelligence telling you exactly how you feel about that problem and this inner knowledge is available to you every second of the day.

On my home page, I have a quick exercise that guides you to finding the feeling behind thoughts.  I've re-stated here for your convenience:


Think of a thought for about 15 seconds – a really bad thought - something that makes you feel “sick” and notice how your body feels...

Are you thinking?

Five seconds left...

5... 4... 3... 2... 1!

Now for the next 15 seconds, “flip” that bad thought to its exact opposite. The problem is solved – completely. Whatever it was, just pretend it's “all okay” (even though it's not)...

How did you feel the second time?




Some people have strong physical sensations when doing this exercise. They feel incredibly lighter, happier or have “tingling” or “moving” sensations as their energy shifts. If you did, great, you're on the right track.

So, what just happened in that exercise

Did you just do an emotional intelligence assessment?  Yes.

Did you just practice one of the main components of the emotional intelligence theory by assessing how you felt?  Yes.

Did you start finding your own definition of emotional intelligence and what it means to you?  Hopefully, yes.

DEFINE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE - CONTROL:  Once you identify your emotions and assess how they feel, you'll want to figure out how to control them so you can stay within your power to create your own happiness.

Why is it important to control your emotions when trying to answer the question, “What is Emotional Intelligence?” 

Because this is where you really have to integrate your cognitive “thinking” power of your mind with the emotional part of your mind.

In fact, this lies at the heart of understanding the emotional intelligence theory because if you dive further into the emotional intelligence research, you'll see that it's all about integrating the cognitive part of the mind with the emotional part of the mind.

And there's one more interesting tidbit of information here...

When your mind is completely “absorbed” in your emotions, the rational part of the mind gets “shut out” so you “can't think rationally.”  Positive psychology studies have proven the old adage, “You're too angry to think straight.”

Why?  Because your brain is too busy being “angry” to think rationally.  It's just the way it works.

Also, when you can control your own emotions and stay calm, you have a much stronger ability to influence others around you because you are rationally thinking and operating from a wholly integrated mind.

How Does It Apply to Finding Happiness?

To define emotional intelligence in regard to happiness means...

Increasing your ability to improve emotional intelligence is key to finding happiness...

When you have been able to increase your emotional intelligence quotient by learning how to identify, assess and control your emotions, you are able to stay in tune with your inner knowledge in a much better way than just “thinking with the rational side of your brain.” 

By having the ability to do this, you are well on your way to becoming more balanced and happier and the point of this emotional intelligence article is to help you realize that you have the power to become happier simply by continuing to “listen to your gut” and learning how to integrate its intelligence into your life. 

relax-and-listen-to-hypnosisThis is a cool hypnosis download that improves your emotional intelligence by:

Helping you control unwanted emotional responses;

Helping you understand your own emotions better and recognize others' emotions so you can understand them better.

Here's the link to find out more about this neat hypnosis download.

And here's an another article that explains more about this great subject:

What is Emotional Intelligence and How Does it Relate to Positive Thinking?  “What is Emotional Intelligence” is a hot question today with so much emphasis on emotional intelligence in business and how it strongly affects our success at work.  But it also affects success...


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